Our feelings or emotions certainly add a colourful dimension to our lives – they help us understand ourselves and what is happening between ourselves and those around us.
Often people speak of positive emotions such as happiness and joy. Anger and sadness are in turn referred to as negative emotions. We thus begin to view some emotions as being good or acceptable – and other emotions as being bad or unacceptable. This thinking is potentially dangerous as we could begin to deny the so-called negative or unacceptable emotions.
In denying our feelings, we begin to deny our true responses to experiences. We may eventually begin to create a ‘false self’ by not acknowledging, even to ourselves our true feelings. The process of denial is often referred to as repression. Repression of our feelings will eventually have a negative effect on our mental, physical, spiritual and social health.
My view is that all emotions are positive and necessary because they assist us – for example feelings of anger tell us that something is wrong; whereas feelings of happiness communicate that all is well.
It is good for us to acknowledge our emotions and we should not try to repress them. In acknowledging our feelings we ask the question ‘why’ and so we put words to emotions. For example ‘I feel sad. Why? Because our cat died.’ We develop self-awareness and also awareness of how our environment is affecting us.
At times it may be difficult to understand our feelings and if that is the case it may be wise to either share with a trusted friend or seek professional help. Objective input may be needed to help in the processing of deep feelings and emotions particularly feelings of anger, despair or depression.
People who have good emotional intelligence are able to acknowledge and manage their emotions or feelings.